On departing 3 BAD I accompanied my MFO boxes and set off from Venlo, I shared a vehicle (hired from Staff Sergeant Jim Simpson) with 3 other lads on route to Zebrugge, then on to Dover, we had no problems with customs, but as it was early hours we were stopped by the local Hampshire police who thought we looked suspicious. The male officer was being bloody minded whilst his female partner was more obliging. We showed our military identity cards also my posting order, only then did they let us go. I had pre arranged for a married quarter to be taken over on my behalf by an old mate Ray (Leepy) Lee, who would leave the keys in the duty bunk at 81 Ord Coy, then locating Ordnance Road was fun, wandering around near the fire station I realised that I was trying to open the door of some fire fighters house!!. Eventually I found the place 9 Mathews Terrace just along the road, I opened the front door and got a shock, this was an old property and the decoration was a nightmare, the hallway/stairwell was lime green (more like exorcist green!) and the kitchen was Bright Yellow. It was small, 2 bedrooms, obviously built for midgets, anyway I unloaded the MFO's and tried to get some kip.

Apparently Ray did not take over my quarter, but by CSM Barney Appleyard (I won't say what my thoughts were), I was far from pleased. We got settled in fairly quickly and did the usual admin, bank, shopping etc. I started work on the monday booking in and liked the place. I had been to Montgomery lines a few times before, it was formerly 1st Parachute Logistics Regiment. First impressions were good, I was taking over from John Chapman who was being posted to Hong Kong, the OC was just leaving (Posted), the unit was high profile and the moral was high too, it's own unit bar (Churchill club) Rhine Barracks, I'd been there before on P company ouch!!.

81 Ordnance Company (6 Field Force), which replaced 16 Parachute Brigade (1976) - Click Here.

Some of the Para lads weren't too happy about the name change (6 Field Force), at one point (Just outside the Churchill Club) the Montgomery Lines guard had to keep watch on the new sign "6 Field Force" as it was regularly painted out!!, the Churchill Club is where 81 Ord Coy had their own bar, needless to say no one saw a thing lol.

81 Ord Coy had a good reputation within 6 field force and we had no problem wheeling/dealing favours, all above board of course. Loads of sporting facilities so this was right up my street, we used to go to various gym's, assault courses and the local garrison swimming pool which had seen better days, although we did then go to Gibraltar Barracks (Royal Engineers). The guys really enjoyed swimming especially the stretcher race in the pool, some were always trying to swing the lead going sick to avoid the runs/assault course, so I decided to catch them out by arranging a swimming session, but whilst on parade I quietly told Alan Storey to select the skivers out to give him a hand in the shed whereupon Alan promptly took them out to Long Valley, they still got to go swimming, in the mud!!!. I tried to vary the fitness training on fridays prior to happy hour in the afternoon, where the OC usually bought a barrel for the lads, Creep!!. We had some wild characters here, Tug Wilson the 2 i/c, Tony Frangos (we met again in the Falklands where I got him out of the smelly stuff), Phil Stant, yes I could see this was going to be fun. By the same token we had some miserable sods, but like Heavy Drop when it was someone's birthday in they went, no, not a static water tank, but the Basingstoke Canal (Phew), trouble is if you really wanted to dip someone you had to be prepared to go in with them (Tug) but that was stopped due to Weil's Disease.

Photo's Compliments of Ray (Leepy) lee

The accommodation blocks for the single lads was grim, no privacy at all, quite often the lads from 9 Sqn para engineers would invade scrapping and letting off various coloured smoke grenades, hence the multi coloured stairwells. It was difficult for the living in lads to get women into the blocks, very open, however, Phil Stant, his mate Yates and another lad invited some local "Ladies" for a guided tour, except these ladies decided to borrow some items/money without getting permission. A week or two later the local cops visited the unit, these ladies were prolific thieves, oh and had some STD's, the cops weren't all that bothered that they were under age, but strongly advised anyone present who'd been with these "Ladies" to see the medical officer asap, before their bits started dripping glass / razor blades!!, the female military cop present there was wetting herself, not so some of the lads.

Jimmy Greaves (RIP) and Geordie Trewitt were jack the lads too, especially when Neil Murray's brand new motorbike went walkies and the parts sold as spares in Sunderland, I remember Jimmy & Geordie were messing about in the swimming pool, so I sent them out, they sneaked back in, so I informed them not to make plans for that weekend. They along with some other miscreants were invited to longbottom valley/long valley early saturday morning for a gentle stroll (run) in the morning mud, however Jimmy & Geordie were missing. On the monday Jimmy Boyle ex Black Watch (CSM) jailed them, their faces were a picture. Later on the CSM told me to collect a patient (Our cook) from the military hospital, the AO wanted a chat reference his unusual behaviour after downing 40 valium and attacking the cook sergeant, afterwards our cook was placed in custody (guardroom) for his own protection, along with one of our long term absentee's who'd escaped from custody before but had given himself up to face the music. But guess who's guard commander that night, yes, yours truly, guest No 1 (cook) in cell one was banging away on the cell door with an empty coffee jar the RP's had missed, not the brightest of people. Then later on the RMP's arrived with a drunken / injured soldier, alas there was no room at the inn, so off they went to Buller Barracks where everything was to the guard commanders liking, a quiet night all in all.

Captain Carmen (tutenkamen) was the new 2md in Command (2 i/c), on exercise in Denmark he had two packs of beer in his landrover, which mysteriously disappeared! the troops were reasonably happy that night, I couldn't find any trace of empty cans / ring pulls, however, Carmen did do a lot for the unit and not always appreciated. The first night on exercise (Denmark) I was guard commander, Rene Green used the field telephone to the Command Post, Carmen answered (still half asleep), Rene tried to explain a security issue, Carmen still dozy, Rene said "Wake you C***" Carmen "I'm the 2 i/c !, don't talk to me like that" Rene, what a lad. I remember the 2 i/c coming into the lecture room upstairs in the storehouse, the room was full of troops some obviously didn't notice the no smoking sign, capt carmen said "Can't any of you lads see that sign up their" I replied "I can't see sir, there's too much smoke" he and the troops howled, so he did at least have a sense of humour. In a nearby town Phil Stant and his sidekick Yate's were performing in a pub and got thrown out again. Back in the shot Julian Novak (ex Heavy Drop) was in the armoury after returning from the ranges, and decided to dispose of a blank round i.e. discharging it inside, whereupon the OC 9 Sqn (his office directly above) ran downstairs giving Julian a rocket, (Julian Recently). The new OC Major McDougal was a typical staff officer who liked to visit Mummy/Daddy when on exercise near minley manor, he nearly came a cropper when relieving himself near a trip flare, Bang! nearly 1% burns!! (reminds of a Jerry Lee Lewis song) goodness gracious great B**ls of fire, well, phosphorus can seriously damage your family jewels.

We spent our Summer camp at Tenby in Wales, a combination of playing soldiers / adventurous training, however, we had been ordered to attend the RAOC UK Traverse Clark sports meeting at the Aldershot Military Stadium for the day. I was lucky ?, I had to train the Tug-O-War team, unfortunately we were paired up against my old boss Bob reid (Ex Heavy Drop), Bob said hello, then punched me in the guts, then his team promptly pulled us out of the ground, hiding to nothing!!.

The unit acquired a video player and one of those (new at that time) concave screens where you had to sit directly in front of the screen to see anything, we hired it out to other units, the good thing it was classed as a duty for me and the MT Staff Sergeant (Waddington), we were due to have a showing at the wives club of the Royal Regiment of Wales, a carry on type film, but they were all rented out, so Show-Waddy Waddy (Waddington) got what he thought was something similar, how wrong he was. When the equipment was set up the RSM's wife checked that all was ready, the troops wives all present and correct (No rank here of course ???), however, the video showing got very hot and steamy, whooops, the RSM's wife was quick off the mark, needless to say that was their first and last showing.

6 Field Force - 81 Ordnance Company 1981

I did bump into Malcolm Bowering (Geordie - Ex 16 Para Heavy Drop) in the shot, he was in the process of rebadging into the Army Physical Training Corps, on his senior (Probs) Probationer, he later rebadged, then was in charge of Maida Gym top of Queens Avenue, so he didn't get posted far from Hammersley Barracks. He did come around for tea/dinner a couple of times, Malcolm and I have met recently a few times about good times at the big H, (See also 90 Ord Coy).

I attended my RPC 1 course (Regimental Proficiency Certificate) the emphasis being on mental!, with me were Leepy lee, Smudge Smith and Billy Smart. This was run by the Military Training Wing (MTW) at 16 Bn COD Bicester, I thought I'd seen the back of that place, however, it was a scream, some characters there like Bernie Reeby (45 Commando - Arbroath). One of the rooms in our block was picked up on inspection so we all had to parade in best kit, stood by our beds, as we were getting ready, two of our lads came in and said it wasn't happening, apparently Terry Skeels our MTI instructor binned the idea, so quick change and down to the naafi. We did get collared for rememberance day parade in Bicester town, we had to practice on the parade square with Ernie Wise, no, the the comedian but another instructor, he was to act as a senior citizen (Veteran) slowly walking, swaying and dithering whilst we marched behind him. I also got "Chosen" to take the physical training each morning at 6 am, as the senior instructor (Kev Townsend) slept in on the first day, it was decided that I should continue with this "Mutual" arrangement, I didn't mind, but got some static from the older members on the course, my motto was "Under 29, your all mine". Each day the duty student was responsible for ensuring we were at the right place & time, but as so many cocked it up, they got extra duties, I never got the privilege of that duty, I certainly wasn't complaining. Kev Townsend later joined us as CSM, he was a lad and a half, Kev replaced Jimmy Boyle.

RPC 1 Course (COD Bicester) November 1981

Some of us decided not to bother going down to the naafi at morning break, we decided to pop into the cookhouse, hey, Bicester had certainly changed for the better, there was bacon & egg sarnies, tea / coffee available, all free!!, so we duly helped ourselves, well, until the chef asked us what shift we were on??, shift, no, were on RPC 1, needless to say our freebies came to an abrubt halt, thought it was too good to be true. Some of the lads were nervous when giving lessons (Weapon training etc) in the classroom, I've never laughed so much, they got all flustered, obviously they'd never had much practice, some of us, Bernie Reeby and a few others just looked at each other ending up in tears, totally unable to control ourselves in fits of laughter, we even decided to split ourselves up so as not to start each other off, we failed miserably, it didn't work, great times.

I later got all my qualifications for promotion, except manning records wanted me on an MTI course, I managed to avoid that, however, they got me at the second attempt, the course was at Blackdown Barracks, only one guy had actually volunteered!, RSM George Penrose (also ex Black Watch) assured us if we deliberately failed the course we'd get an A grade and posting to Blackdown. However, CSM Jimmy Boyle (81 Ord Coy) rang up his mate George (RSM) and asked him to inform me that I was on the promotion roll, so you can guess my reaction to the course and where they could stick it. Whilst there I bumped into "Ziv Ziverts & "Pip" Pittaway (Ex Heavy drop lads), they hadn't changed a bit, still as mad as ever, good lads all the same. At the same time i had the pleasure ?? of bumping into the other RSM Dusty Miller (Ex 3 BAD), still a miserable as ever, as well as Scous Cannel, Phil Schultz, John Bolton and Ken Hollows, don't think they were enjoying themselves at the training depot (Punishment Posting more like).

A few months later my posting came through for Hong Kong, I'd been telling the lads that would be my next posting (well over a year), so when it came through I promptly double checked with the Chief Clerk, as sometimes there's wind up's, Des Chapman & Ray (Leepy) Lee were definitely up to something. Then I informed the MTO Martin Hardy & his oppo Roy Dade (Chas & Dave) what a racket they made lol, Martin was born in Honkers, well, he was well pi**ed off, I also sent a photocopy to my mate Phil Norbury just to please him, he later reciprocated by replying in kind, a year later he got posted to sunny Cyprus, Tw*t.

Not long after the Falklands conflict started, I thought that's it, posting to Honkers cancelled, but no, I was still going. Well, I wasn't going to get upset about not going to the South Atlantic was I ?, the lads went to Sennybridge for week prior to sailing on the QE2 whilst I got the sun tan lotion ready.

I was posted mid May 1982 and really looking forward to Honkers on promotion to Sergeant, taking over from ?? ...........yes you've guessed it John Chapman, he told me "You must keep up your fluid intake to avoid dehydration" San Miguel is not what I had in mind.

I later found out the sad demise of Jimmy Greaves, Ken Wishart, Captain Neil Fletcher and my old ex Heavy Drop mate Paul Bunker

all good lads taken far too early (R.I.P boys)

However, this was not the last I'd see of 81 Ordnance Company!! to be continued........

Montgomery Lines are still there, sadly all the barracks are boarded up, the Para Depot is now a Royal Logistic depot

Next posting - Click here to go to COD Hong Kong